Sunday, June 05, 2005

A Personal Statement from His Magestic Robert Mugabe

“Dear Comrades
After the recent spate of biased and mischievous reporting by the colonialist foreign press, I have ultimately decided to reveal to you, the honest and hard-working citizens of Zimbabwe, a little more of Mugabe - The Man.

I know you love your leader as much as you love your country. I know you deserve to see what kind of man I am. To those of you that already know me, this will simply be a joyous refresher of your cherished memories of me. To those with the still unfulfilled desire to know me better, I welcome you to an intimate glimpse of Mugabe - The Man.

The white racists in America forced Michael Jackson to find his roots, and happily he chose Zimbabwe - the land of the free - as his destination. I put on my rare Liz Taylor gown for the occasion and met him personally at Zim Aerodrome. He asked me for asylum but I assured him that we only put members of the opposition there.”

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